Sometimes we get just what we want. Sometimes we find a lump of coal. The true gift lies in where it leads us.
For the last week or two, the storage room where I work has held something bright and shiny. Tucked into the corner, was a brand new purple bicycle, complete with training wheels and handlebar tassels, awaiting its delivery by Santa to a little girl named Sophie.
I have the pleasure of getting to see Sophie, a co-worker's seven-year-old daughter, regularly. Her coppery hair, huge blue eyes and playful smile, bring me instant joy. In the weeks leading up to Christmas, whenever asked about what she wanted from Santa, her reply was the same – a purple bike. When I teased her, claiming a recent newspaper article announced the North Pole elves had voted to only make orange bikes this year, she held fast with a no-nonsense eye roll and “no, I get purple” insistence.
Of course, Sophie got just what she wanted this Christmas. I can only imagine how her blue eyes twinkled when her gaze first landed on that purple bike. But I suspect she got even more than what she wanted, for the bicycle over which she had relentlessly pined, is really just a key to unlock her imagination. Some days it may become a time machine. Or a rocket ship to take her to the moon and stars. Perhaps she will use it to outrun the imaginary bad guys, or save the world from impending doom. With Sophie atop her purple steed, anything is possible. That’s the real gift.
As we get older, it gets far more complicated than waiting for Santa to bring us the things we most want. Often times, the things we receive require a bit of figuring out. They may surprise us in the most lovely of ways, or not appear as gifts at all. The proverbial fat lump of coal. Getting the most of it – soaking in in its unexpected pleasure or looking past the ugly wrapper – lies in letting it be more than what it initially appears. Unwrapping, unpacking and trying it on for size, even when we believe a fit is not possible.
Sometimes we receive beautiful and perfect things we didn’t even know we wanted. A casual encounter that sparks the relationship to fill a gap we didn't know existed. The knowledge that something we did profoundly influenced the life of another. The crazy confluence of random snippets of stuff that ignites into a big, productive idea. Call it serendipity if you like, but treasure these happenings as the gifts they really are.
Once in a while, we are the recipient of something unwanted, confusing, even tremendously painful, but once we pass through the other side of the firewall, we find a better version of our self. The “great unwanted” forced us to take a path we would have never followed on our own, yet unwittingly and desperately needed to find. And that passage, is a gift.
And yes, sometimes the things we get are purely awful and wholly undeserved. No amount of prayer, introspection or open-mindedness will ever lead us to its silver lining. I believe the gift in these is their use as tipping points. Their value comes in how they shape us, in whether we choose to be a permanent victim of the pain or move to a place of greater wisdom and grace. The world is full of people who’ve been dealt a terrible hand of cards (far darker than most will ever imagine), yet play them with awe-inspiring brilliance. They found the gift, the gift of choice, which leads to the ultimate gifts of resilience, courage and human victory.
I hope there are lots of purple bike moments this Christmas. Those moments that are nearly too good to be true. For those that do not meet the mark, there is still time. The proverbial “you shouldn’t have” gift may be, if we are willing to work on it a little, exactly what we need.
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